personal development – Emma Lo Russo

January 10, 2012January 10, 2012

Hope powering change

Last night I attended the Sydney Festival event Hope 2012 with the theme “Citizens seizing the day”.

Social Media was hailed as one of the agents of change. Certainly it has made it possible even in oppressed societies for citizens to reach more people and help gain momentum and support for their plight and desired change (think recent people lead change in Egypt as well as community support generated for those affected by QLD Floods, NZ & Japan Earthquakes etc).

However social media really only represents an easy, low-cost, high reach and engagement channel. It is not the channel that brings change but the opportunity it presents and the people who engage within it and the messages they share.

Listening to the personal stories of the great speakers last night and those across Australia, there were some common and consistent messages that suggest a blue print for bringing about change. They point to the cause of which the channel is only the conduit:

1) Hope Powers Change – you must first genuinely hope to bring about change . Hope then provides the fuel and momentum for you to continue in the face of adversity, inequity, barriers, and power imbalance. Hope also binds people together behind a common cause.

2) It starts with the first step – no matter how small, everything you contribute to bringing change no matter how small can make a difference. The benefits of taking 1 minute of your time, showing or demonstrating your encouragement and support, donating something small (time, message, money, resources). Just taking an action can generate, add-to or complete some great act of change in someone’s life. It has the added benefit of impacting you positively too.

3) Look for, understand & stand for basic human rights – equality, freedom, opportunity for everyone – how can you ensure this is enjoyed by everyone. Identify how many of your rights you take for granted that are not available to others. Identify the basic human rights that are being challenged all around the world including in our own back yard (and our legislation).

4) Connect directly with people affected – it is too easy to be disconnected from the person and people who needs help. Listen to their story. Listen to their hope. It is impossible to ignore and will help you know the right action to take.

5) Have Courage – it requires courage to stand up, have a voice, be counted and more importantly to act. It starts with the courage to ask yourself “why is this happening and what can I do to change it?”

It felt easy to applaud those making changes last night however significantly more difficult and uncomfortable to ask ourselves how much are we doing at the individual level to bring about change.

It matters not how much we have done to support required changes in the past, only how much we can do moving forward.

I reflect on the great George Bernard Shaw quote:

“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.”

It points to the need to stand resolute and that we must first look to ourselves as the instruments of change.

May 2012 be your year. Allow Hope to power the change you desire.

September 24, 2011September 24, 2011

Choosing the right mentor

I was recently asked what someone should look for in a good mentor.

The first thing to do is to recognize the value in engaging a good mentor or coach to help you hold yourself accountable for developing yourself and taking your career to the next level.

The value of seeking a career mentor is in how they can help you bring clarity to your career goals over the near, medium and long term, to help you prioritize your next steps towards your goals, how to strategize and evaluate options in light of your goals and values, and to help you stay accountable to the path you wish to take. Through formalizing this relationship with someone, it provides a regular, safe and confidential sounding board to bounce your fears, aspirations and future challenges.

Finding the right mentor is based on how inspirational they are to you, how experienced, how insightful and how good they are in facilitating the right discussions. High Emotional Intelligence would rate as the key characteristic of a great mentor and just as you would look for a great employee, you want in a great mentor someone who has demonstrated that they are smart, talented, have a history of delivering great results and have built many great relationships and people through their leadership and association.

In a busy working world, it is too easy to rationalize to ourselves what we do and why we do it. Much harder to rationalize to someone else. Particularly if they are asking you the right questions and you are looking inside yourself to provide the right answers.

Both you and they will know when you are making excuses or seeing things through a narrow field of vision.

If you want to take your personal life or career to the next level, it may be time to engage a mentor. The benefits of having someone else push, question, strategize with you through mentoring can only lead to greater success.

June 28, 2011March 29, 2017

Tips for leading successful negotiations

Often in business or when supporting coaching clients, I am asked to prepare or help someone to lead a successful negotiation. Here I share my key tips for leading successful individual negotiations:

Prepare in advance – understand the principles of bracketing. Plan for, and clearly know your high point, your low point and your mid point. Your midpoint should be what you are happy to be paid, your low point is your walk away, and anything upside of your midpoint you should be delighted. Think about your strategy in how you could move your first asking point greater then where it would otherwise be to help raise the midpoint.
Try to avoid putting your price down first – no matter what. Look to get the person you are negotiating with to state their position, their thinking, their decision-making criteria. You can look to set the agenda and ideal outcomes based on principles before a number or the details of the introduction gets introduced.
Keep your cards close to you and actively listen to the other party to help you determine your approach and negotiation tactics. To get the other person to state his or her position first assuming the status quo is fine with you and there is no pressure on you to make a move, be bold enough to say to the other side, “You approached me. The way things are, satisfies me. If you want to do this, you’ll have to make a proposal to me.”
Hold to your position for as long as you can – see how far they will come to your point first without you budging or without you budging far. Communicate all the time that you are prepared and ready to make the deal and find something that works for everyone.
Understand all the influencers and decision makers – you must know and work with the person authorized to make the deal. Talk to the key decision maker. Spend time in researching, listening and understanding their drivers and frame of reference.
Discussions should always begin with a clear understanding of the win-win-win. How do they win, how do you win, how do you win together? Much research has been done to support the approach of winning for everyone is a much better outcome and brings greater results (financial & emotional) then if you have win by screwing down the other party. Negotiation is based on the foundations of inspiration and persuasion. How can you make the other party see your point of view or vision for the future?
Negotiation is not always about money – negotiation can be based on a number of factors. Think creatively and really understand your own drivers. For instance, in salary negotiations you may be looking at any one of the following elements: Base Salary, Added Benefits, Profit Share & other short &/or long term incentives, Working environment & flexibility in hours, Additional holiday periods, Job enrichment & satisfaction based on doing more of what you love.
Avoid being the first to double bracket or to negotiate against yourself (you would be surprised at how many people do this – make an offer, then jump in with another based on the other person’s non-response). Hold and wait until the other person makes their offer known. Hold too on your final position and get them to talk about what they are thinking and what you can do to help them. Reinforce their and the combined win in the win-win-win situation. Identify any potential barriers to bringing closure to the negotiations. Think about how you can remove them or how else they could be viewed and change your tactics accordingly.
There may be variables in a negotiation, understand what they are and be clear (first be clear to yourself) as to what is important to you – eg timing, breakdown, flexibility etc
Consider the power of using time as a variable – what needs to be done by when and how flexible can you or the negotiating party be around that (and what is the value to you around that variability). Gain a sense of urgency – if the other party is keen to bring closure to the negotiations you may in fact be able to use that urgency to your advantage by moving slowly and looking like you don’t care how long it takes. However look to ensure the principles of having something that works for everyone remains a priority.
Never negotiate when you are feeling emotional. Try to keep a level head at all times. If you need a break, request time to think about the offer until you can think straight again. Talk out loud to someone else if you need some help in unraveling your emotions and to help reform the confidence and rationale in your approach and position.
Remember to celebrate the final result of your negotiations. It is important to ensure all parties feel good about the deal that was done.
Once concluded, spend some time reflecting – could you have done things differently for next time? Any lessons learned?
Finally, never let the other party know you were prepared to accept less or pay more in the negotiations. They will feel bad, and you will lose any goodwill created by the win-win-win principle.

Each of us negotiates many things and many times in daily life and in business. By considering these simple strategies, you should obtain an outcome you are happy with.

For leading more complex negotiations, there are many resources available. One book that I recommend reading is “Negotiation Genius – how to overcome obstacles and achieve brilliant results at the bargaining table and beyond” by Deepak Malhotra & Max H. Bazerman, Harvard Business School 2007

What have you found works for you? Do you recommend any strategies or resources that have helped you? What tips would you offer others who want to lead successful negotiations?

February 27, 2011March 29, 2017

Working for pressure or pleasure?

Socrates said “The Life which is unexamined is not worth living”. Just as you empty your piggy bank to count the coins to determine how much value you have created, it is a good thing to tip your life upside down and shake it around to allow you to view it from a few more angles and evaluate the sum of your life value.

However unlike the coins that have a predetermined value, the value we place on all the individual and collective “life” experiences can be viewed very differently and uniquely by each person. The most important evaluation is the one you place on it. How do you measure the value of your total life experiences against all aspects of your life: Family, Professional, Health, Financial, Spiritual, Social, Intimacy and Community?

The sum of where you are today, and how you got here, is not measured by time and does not predetermine the course of the total life balance and value. What got you here, might not get you to where you would like to end up. Time is not measured in minutes, hours and days in a life value, but rather by what you do with your time.

Which comes to the question, what are we working to generate? Are we working with clear purpose? Towards something that will give us a great sense of peace, happiness and satisfaction? Have we truly evaluated the value we are looking to generate? The legacy we would like to leave? And importantly, how to get there?

Many executives and people I know talk of the “treadmill” they are on. Even more so at the start of a calendar year when there seems to be a lot more “getting started” meetings, new activities, education and sporting schedules to be slotted in. People feel just as they are getting into the swing of things, planning for the new financial year begins, and before you know it you are working hard to deliver a number of things with hard deadlines and pressure to deliver on multiple goals, commitments and resolutions.

Since I often feel the weight of the number of balls I choose to juggle, I recently asked myself this question “am I working for pressure or pleasure”? This shifted things for me. Although I set out (in a pretty determined way) to work for pleasure both personally and professionally, doing what I love, with people I love, for people I love; I can get hooked on the pressure and use that to drive outcomes. Before I know it I realize I am working to the rhythm of pressure, and forget that I want to work for pleasure. My experience tells me I can achieve far more and enjoy it far more along the way, when I work for pleasure.

There is no right or wrong answers or evaluations when examining your own life. The key is to evaluate it regularly and to make it meaningful to you. To consciously maximize the value you are looking to generate. To gain pleasure in what you do so that you can achieve more of what it is you want to do.

If you see your life as a piggy bank made up of multiple experiences, against each aspect of your life, with each holding a personalized value, how are you going against the total value you are looking to generate? What will you change?

October 27, 2010March 29, 2017

How do people experience you?

I recently made the decision to switch from PC to Mac for my business platform.

Everything about the experience – from walking into the store; interacting with the technology; enjoying the broader synergies with our iPhones and iPads; the ease in which I am able to connect and share content with my family and business colleagues; the stories, sharing and understanding offered by the broader Apple community – has lead me to think about the importance “experience” plays in our decision making.

Every single part of my exposure, interactions, associations – my collective experience with Apple – is always positive, enjoyable and exceeded my expectations.

The relationship between our experiences and our feelings are key drivers to the decisions we make.

Just like a product or company brand’s true value is in the eye of the consumer and how it is perceived in the market place, our personal brand is really valued by the experiences people have with you and the perceptions they then form.

Today, there is much talk about the importance in investing in personal branding. Spending time to understand and shape what we represent as individuals, how we represent our core values and articulate our unique selling proposition.

Asking people to stop and think of how they may be viewed and the disparity to how they wish to be viewed, can certainly grow self-awareness and can influence behaviours.

How people view, interact, associate, and do business with you, are all opportunities for people to “experience” you. The experience they have with you is far more important in determining their evaluations of you and the decisions they make that concern you, than anything else.

Considering how meaningful, enjoyable, interactive, and valuable the experience people have of you is as important in the social web as it is in our personal dealings.

When you consider the ease in which we can connect, associate, interact and share on the social web, do you consider what experience people are having of and with you? Is it consistent with the experience they would have with you and you would hope to deliver in person?

It certainly makes an interesting point for reflection:- what experience are people having when they see, read, or exchange something with you? Or in more simple terms: – How do people experience you online as well as in person?

July 19, 2010March 29, 2017

Compliance vs Engagement

Doing the basic job required of us, in most cases, is easy to do. In fact we can often do much of what we do without having to really engage, invest and stretch ourselves.

We learn from an early age to follow instructions. To have our creative thinking ordered with a set of pre-determined decisions to create structure, harmony and order.

Certainly it helps to learn the consequences of taking actions that are outside of what is expected of us. However do we consider the dangers to progress if we merely look and teach others to comply?

How often do you hear “I do this because that is what is asked of me.” Or “I don’t do this, because the rules say not to.” In business we can often provide more processes, instructions and parameters to reduce risk and error margins, but what happens when it stops people from thinking or taking ownership all together?

In this past week, I saw two separate cases where perfectly intelligent and capable people were discussing a problem within their working environments. In being challenged as to why they did not see those problems as ones they could solve, the dutiful responses were offered around it not being their job, it wasn’t done that way, there was red tape, a usual way to solve this etc.

In reality, they had become compliant. Stopped thinking, stopped ownership, stopped engaging with the broader objectives and motivations for their companies and themselves.

It didn’t take long to unlock their thinking and to see alternate ways to own and solve the problems they were facing.

Unfortunately once I started looking for examples of compliance over engagement elsewhere, I started to see it everywhere – in customer service across multiple businesses, in my children, and in me. It has made for an interesting point for reflection.

Key to solving passive compliance is engagement ourselves and encouraging engagement in others. It is not enough to just observe or be present. Not enough to comply even if it gets you over the line and off the hook. What is required of us is to really engage with a problem you see and view it as something you can own, influence and drive towards a solution.

In these cases I refer to this week, by engaging with the problem didn’t mean these clients had to make the problem their own completely and feel the pressure to solve it on their own.

In both cases it was enough to shift the thinking from it being someone else’s problem to being “our problem” to solve. And to get them thinking about how they could lead and influence change. To think about possible options and opportunities.

Seeing the bigger picture and not being hamstrung by barriers – perceived or real, allows for progress.

By engaging fully with what you are hoping to achieve and not the process of getting there, promotes critical thinking and creativity. It brings action and results.

Where do you need to switch gears and move from compliance to engagement to really generate progress?

July 1, 2010March 29, 2017

The Try> Apply> Fly Approach

A key part of mastering something is practice.

As children we understand this concept as we try time and time again to do the perfect cartwheel, learn to ride a bike, catch a ball or master a popular dance move.

As we get older, we recognize and appreciate mastery in others, and will often choose to step aside to allow other experts to show the way.

Although I am a big believer in recognizing and playing to people’s strengths and working to your own, it worries me to see so many adults defer or give up before they have given something new their best shot. A best shot can mean quality of preparation and at least a solid period of dedication in learning and putting into practice.

In Malcolm Gladwell’s book “The Outliers – The Story of Success”, he introduces the 10,000 hour rule.

The basic premise is that it takes 10,000 hours of dedication to your craft or skill before you are likely to really master or become a “superstar” at it. He also adds, to be a true Outlier, it probably takes 10,000 hours plus talent and a timing opportunity before you really make it into the Outlier league (those that truly stand apart from the rest of the high achievers).

The more involved I am in successful businesses or with people who have achieved success, the more the pattern for success and mastery of something is evident. And it is not just spending time (or 10,000 hours) working on something. It is more their approach. An approach based on continuous feedback, learning, finessing, trying and applying.

Stories shared by successful people often have the same theme: they tried, they learned, they applied their new skills, they tried again, and applied their learnings, until eventually they mastered what they set out to do.

Even when they achieved what they first set out to do, they went back to the same cycle of try>apply>fly to reach new heights.

Yes, they experienced fear. Yes, they experienced failure (often many times), but they all had the approach of continuing to try and not giving up until they succeeded.

Seems like an easy lesson for each of us.

You need to be happy to continuously Try and Apply to really Fly!

May 17, 2010March 29, 2017

Inertia – the biggest threat to progress

Years ago when I was studying for my HSC, my parents imposed a curfew. I was not able to go out unless I did 15 hours study a week.

Fortunately for me they did not specify where I had to spend my time, so I focused a minimum of 10 hours a week where my passion lay – painting and art – and the rest to what I considered at the time as the boring subjects. The 15 hour study curfew became easy to meet and the targets I had for my social life were able to be easily fulfilled.

It was a great lesson around naturally pursuing the areas you feel passionate about. This time and effort I naturally skewed towards was also rewarded in me later winning a number of art awards. I easily connected that if you work and operate from a position of passion, it delivers you significant power to excel.

When you love something and love what you are doing, you naturally progress. You find things easy to do and easy to commit to. This principle serves you just as well in your working career as it will in your personal life.

I am sure you can validate this principle with your own examples.

Recall a time where you pursued something you felt really passionate about and it propelled you to success. Now reflect on how you felt.

You felt buzzed right? When you did what you love and you achieved the goal you were hoping for, you felt highly energized, invincible and ready for more.

This isn’t rocket science, so why do we sit for far too long in jobs or in situations pursuing something where we don’t feel that passion?

A number of people I know have communicated their unhappiness in their current situation.

They try to justify not doing anything by rationalizing away the risks of changing with the comfort levels of today. They know and can be strong at articulating what they would prefer to be doing, even going so far to identify the steps they need to take to get there, but still don’t go and pursue it. The longer they look for reasons to not move, the more the barriers to change seem larger.

When focusing on the fear of change and potential downsides, there is a great danger that the sense of “too hard” will set in. Or worse, you quickly move into a mode of accepting what you are not happy with, with a feeling of “this is good as it gets”. So you stay in something you are not happy with.

Yet we can all recall examples and look to people where a decision to change was made and it was pursued. Or perhaps you know someone or were forced to make changes through circumstances not of your own doing.

These changes and shifts in life often become the catalyst to move onto much greater things, greater than what may have first been considered. It is a powerful feeling when you have new opportunities, new ways of thinking, new ways of working, new ways of juggling life to pursue.

We look back and see that change as the greatest thing that happened to us. Change brings opportunity. Change brings great personal growth which helps us professionally.

More importantly change gives us an opportunity to tap into our passions. To find the things that once again excite us, energize us, propel us forward.

So don’t allow inertia to kill your progress.

Make the changes today to align what you do with your passions. At a minimum, the bigger the wave of change and the bigger the ride, the less likely you will have time to look back and you will enjoy the process of moving forward.

Take a step forward today and see how quickly your passion will carry you towards success.

May 2, 2010May 2, 2010

Senior Women share the Benefits of Mentoring

Recently I was asked to support FITT’s Mentoring Program in the capacity of interviewer to help assess and match the right mentor to the mentee candidates.

FITT (Females in Information Technology and Telecommunications) run a dedicated Mentor program connecting experienced and senior women with up and coming managers and executive women within the industry. Mentors volunteer their time and range from CEOs, CIOs, COOs, Executive Directors and HR Directors to Senior Architects, Project Directors and Senior Business Analysts. These women are impressive – with significant achievements and scope of responsibilities and sit at the top of very well known top organizations in the technology and telecommunications space.

Mentoring generally refers to a personal developmental relationship in which a more experienced or more knowledgeable person helps a less experienced or less knowledgeable person. It provides an informal transmission of knowledge, social capital, and the psychosocial support relevant to work, career, or to personal or professional development.

With huge gender representation divides in boards and senior management across all industries, this program provides a structured support process for these high-achieving women who are already at the top, to share their journeys, their experience and tips for overcoming any barriers with others still on their rising journey.

Ultimately it helps demystify the path, approach and strategies taken and is designed to help address gender imbalance and the question of “how do we get more women to the top”.

Although the mentees obtain great insight and knowledge through the program, the Mentor’s who operate in this capacity, also see the benefits.

Here are the main benefits of mentoring shared by these inspiring women:

Rewarding – each Mentor recognized the great satisfaction and reward gained at a personal level when helping someone else learn, grow and develop their potential, their confidence and their skills. There were many “proud” stories shared of helping others through promotions, major projects and major decisions. Many previous mentor relationships had developed into friendships and mutually-rewarding business relationships where both parties felt they had learned much from each other and enjoyed the connection and history they had shared together immensely.
Recognition – each Mentor could share a story of how someone had helped mentor them along their path to the top. They recognized the value in having a powerful role-model, someone to share their experience and wisdom and connected this to their own learning and support at critical times in their own career progressions. Mentoring was seen as a gift for helping them and it was now time for the gift to be passed on or as a way “to give back”.**
Growing – each Mentor sees mentoring as an opportunity to grow themselves. By taking time out to help someone else, they recognized that they would benefit from self-reflection, from learning about someone new and their different experiences, from the language and skills you use as a Mentor. Often a mentee will push the mentor with their questions, suggestions and probing. These relationships were seen to be mutually sharing and beneficial.
Motivation – each already had a passion for developing people, however mentoring others was seen to be motivating and re-invigorating to themselves. It helped them push themselves, to revisit their own strategies and challenges, to recognize the strengths in others and in making them more aware of their own strengths. It helped them revisit and retap their own drivers of what makes someone successful and more importantly what makes them successful. By taking time out to share experience and knowledge, it unlocked additional wisdom and energy to be applied in new ways.

Many of these women shared their challenges of being a woman in IT. It is wonderful to see so many of these women now providing real employment opportunities, creating flexible and supportive work cultures and in actively helping other women break down barriers and stereotypes.

I enjoyed the interview process immensely and commend these women for taking time out of their busy schedules to share their experience, knowledge and wisdom to help promote the next generation of women leaders.

There are real benefits in Mentoring others – and this is not just for women. So if you see an opportunity to Mentor others outside of your direct report lines, I encourage you to take the opportunity up.

Enjoy the growth, rewards and motivation that will be yours.

** You may be interested in reading this article on returning the gift of experience. Read more>

April 7, 2010March 29, 2017

Speaker & Leadership Development Facilitator for NSW Red Cross

Emma will be keynote speaker and facilitator of an interactive leadership development session for NSW Red Cross Youth Advisory Committee.

Emma will be addressing “How to lead a project team to success” and will be looking at communication, negotiation and management strategies, skills and styles and how they can be applied to ensure solid engagement within project teams and the wider community, and how by applying focus you can achieve your desired outcomes.

The team will benefit from an interactive learning session which will be conducted Saturday 10th April 2010.

For further information on Emma’s keynote speaking and leadership development modules and how they can enhance and progress your people and organization’s development and growth, contact Emma at emma@emmalorusso.com